it’s starting again
“i don’t know how it started
but it’s starting again.
the pain i thought had left
was only hiding.
i believed it went away when you did—
but it didn’t.
maybe hearing someone else’s story
reminded me
i still want you.
maybe…
just maybe,
somewhere inside,
i still hope you’ll forgive me.
i don’t expect you to be here
but a part of me
waits.
wishing those moments could return
not just in memories
but in motion, in breath,
in now.
a name shouldn’t hurt this much.
but yours does.
and maybe it’s worse—
because i keep searching
for the feeling you gave me
in everyone else.
but no one
feels like you.”